Tag Archives: Reviews

Magic Mike

“It’s against the law to touch, but I see a lot of law breakers in here.”

That is easily the most ridiculous one-liner I’ve heard today.

With that said, this is how I imagine straight women will indulge themselves in the eye candy of chiseled abs and swinging man bits that is Magic Mike.

Roughly:

START OF MOVIE

  • Interest
  • Giggly interest
  • Super giggly interest
  • Schoolgirl giggly interest
  • Temperature rising interest
  • *Ab flash* Super interest
  • *More Ab flash* Super-duper interest
  • * Banana hammock square dancing* Swooning with unbearable interest
  • * Sweaty-naked Tatum and McConaughey fighting/wrestling* Ovaries explode with interest
  • *Abs flash* Interest
  • Giggly Interest
  • ….etc
  • Rinse and repeat until the end of the movie
  • Sleep

END OF MOVIE

This is probably how it would go for me.

START OF MOVIE

  • No interest, anger for being at movie.
  • No interest, some points for Buncha Crunch
  • No interest
  • Confusion
  • Slight interest
  • Growing Interest
  • *Ab flash*  Full on interest
  • *More Ab flash*  Large amount of invested interest
  • * Banana hammock square dancing* Sweating with unbearable interest
  • * Sweaty-naked Tatum and McConaughey fighting/wrestling* Very, very overwhelmed with interest
  • No interest
  • Shame
  • Hunger/need a sandwich
  • Sleep

END OF MOVIE 

Mind you that is just an estimate, I don’t claim to know anything about anything.

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