Here is a collection of my carved pumpkins.
Who do you think you are? What do you think you’re doing?
Calling me out in public? Thinking you’re… better… than me?
D.A. Bancroft, the pumpkin carving champion of Where-Ever-I-Live Florida?
No sir. No sir indeed. Mark my words.
Next year… I will ruin you. My pumpkin carving shall eat all other pumpkin carvings placed before it. It will have animatronic eyes and a voice of it’s own. It will be implanted with A.I. that will carry on intelligent conversation while making absurd Halloween related puns. It will breath fire. It will be 30 feet tall and weigh 2.5 tons.
I will write your epitaph in candle lit glory. I will bury you in slimy orange guts.
This. Is. War.
R.I.P. Mr. Bishop. For you depart this world on 10/31/2012.
It just got real.
[…] You may read these terrible words here. […]
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