Something That Fascinates Me

Today at work something incredibly funny and fascinating was brought to my attention. I will paraphrase it a little.

“Frank and his fiancée are living together with his future in-laws? They aren’t married yet? That is bad,” said Person A.

“Shame on him, living in sin. I did it too when I was younger but shame on him,” said Person B.

What is fascinating to me is not the dogma that is central to the theme, but the hypocrisy and judging. Which was later followed by copious talk about extensive gambling from Person B, a recreational gambler. I’m not even mad, I just find it very interesting. It is an aspect of human nature I have observed many times across a few belief systems, but one more than the others.

Let me make this clear so this doesn’t turn into a gigantic religion argument.


Do what makes you happy, complete, warm, and/or tingly inside. Life is too short to be anything but happy. As long as what you believe in doesn’t hurt anybody or impede my ability to pursuit/be happy, I don’t care.

If you believe in Shiva or Jesus, it makes no difference to me. Your relationship with whatever flavor of belief you follow is your business and belongs between you and your deity/deities. I will have civilized logical discussions with you if you want, but ultimately it is your thing. Even if we believe in the same stuff, you have yours and I have mine. You don’t have to like my stance, but before you engage in a discussion with me, know that this is mine.

That being said, the hypocrisy is what I find interesting. The fact that somebody is quick to pass judgement on my life while at the same time having been in the same situation, then ignoring any further transgressions they conduct themselves against what they supposedly revolve their life around.

I know this isn’t anything new and it happens everyday. I am aware of this. I am just making an observation.

So what compels a person to ignore their own ‘short comings’ and sneer at someone else’s?

Is it that when somebody is discussing varying aspects of life, are they detached from their own self, voided from their consciousness and see flaws like a person looking through a window?

Or is it that they are so aware of their own flaws that they must expose and comment on any other person’s?

I feel there is a potential story idea here. I keep mulling what passes through a person consciously and unconsciously for them to ignore their own flaws and judge the exact thing in another person. I probably do it myself and don’t realize. Something is there, but I can’t quite grasp it.

What do you think, any ideas?


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7 thoughts on “Something That Fascinates Me

  1. I like to think about this same thing in a broader sense – dealing with the contradictions within a person’s character.

    I’m fascinated by those parts of myself that contradict other parts of myself. I’ve even been becoming more aware of those things recently because I’m finding that people want to know me (and everyone) in a simple, neat cookie-cutter way. They want to have a little box for each person that defines the boundaries of that person, but I think it’s so much more interesting that none of us fits in a box because we’re too complicated and contradictory.

    I just said a bunch of nothing, but the point is that I agree with what you’ve written and find it fascinating.

    • Frank Bishop says:

      I understand what you are saying. We aren’t defined by any one aspect or side of ourselves. The sides can exist in direct contradiction with other sides of ourselves and other people. We aren’t one dimensional beings, we are complex, multifaceted creatures to be sure. Understanding that division of who we are versus how we perceive things is the trick.

  2. “What compels a person to ignore their own ‘short comings’ and sneer at someone else’s?” Great question, and this is why I enjoy your blog. If nothing else, it is a maturity thing. Maturity being a state of being, not a certain age. Some people just aren’t there yet. 🙂

  3. “Do what makes you happy, complete, warm, and/or tingly inside. Life is too short to be anything but happy. As long as what you believe in doesn’t hurt anybody or impede my ability to pursuit/be happy, I don’t care.” I share your principles in life. I tell my wife sometimes, I don’t care what people say. Who are they to judge us ? What we do or decide is up to us. If they help pay my rent , may be just maybe I’ll reconsider. Otherwise, I don’t care what they say. Your observation is right, others only see the defects in people, they don’t see the good part or before they open their mouth they don’t see the very defect in their lives. sometimes it’s also a way for them to feel good about the crappy selves. I like your honesty and frankness. What you see is what you get. Cool my friend.

  4. Nick says:

    I am going to take the juvenile route and have you just do the following: Throw up the deuces and throw down a couple of swear words and drop the mic and walk away.

    You can substitute a mic for stapler, coffee mug, whatever you happen to have in your hand.

    • Alaric Rays says:

      I thought you dropped deuces? I was so proud of mine a few minutes ago. Maybe I’m out of my league in this discussion.
      I find those contradictions interesting as well. I laugh at them mostly, which I suppose says something about where I am maturity-wise. I do follow that good ol’ credo of ‘Believe in things as you would care for a newborn, with care and love. And feel free to show off your new born to others, however there will be those that just plain hate babies. So, don’t force it on them. Besides, if you do force it on them and the baby then spits/vomits/shits as they oft do, then you are going to do even further damage to them ever wanting to hold a baby again.” Or something like that. I suppose it isn’t really a credo if I made it up as I went. So. Um. Yeah, believe in what you want, just don’t poop on others*
      *unless that is what you and your(hopefully) consenting partner(s) believe in I guess.

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